By Tess Collins
A play about the evolution of the species and a murder mystery set on the moon
SETTING
Moon Base Ptolomy 5. The Year 2525.
CHARACTERS
General Monroe - a professional solider, veteran of the urban wars. She is in charge of Ptolomy 5, a job she regards as an escape from earth and her haunted past.
Agent Hoover - No-nonsense investigator from an Earth's Criminal Investigation Division.
Maintenance Chief Oates - Career army man. Nervous but dependable, loyal, a true patriot.
Nurse Jenna Baker - blond, leggy, beautiful and much smarter than anyone realizes.
Colonel Underwood - weasily underling, ambitious and eager to replace Monroe.
Voices: (can be digitized or taped)
Ptolomy 4 Voice
Phone Computer Voice
Tranquility Bay Voice
Ptolomy 5 Computer Voice
RUNNING TIME
Ninety minutes
SAMPLE: ACT I, SCENE I
THE STAGE
Fade up on a futuristic physician's laboratory, computer equipment, cabinets, a fold-down bed, junky enough that props and people can be hidden. On one wall is a vent large enough for a person to crawl through. Underneath, a mysterious message is scrawled on the wall "ONLY BARBARIANS SURVIVE." The furnishings are stainless steel or a bland gray except for a small tinsel Christmas tree with a half-full bottle of Scotch underneath. Out of place is a oversized combination padlock on a closet door.
Clocks are on the wall noting the time in different cities. One for Greenwich. One for the Naval Observatory Master Clock. A large window bows out upstage showing a barren moonscape. In the background is planet Earth. A person in a space suit connected to a tie line slowly floats in and out of the window frame.
Exits on each side of the laboratory lead to hallways-one in partial view of the audience and having a computer/communications panel in the wall with a weapons locker underneath. On each door is an emblem of Moon Base Ptolomy 5.
AT RISE
A woman and man stand on each side of the window, staring at the floating space suit.
GENERAL MONROE strokes her chin with an attitude of fierce concentration. She is in a military uniform, three stars on her collar, all business and very much in charge.
MAINTENANCE CHIEF OATES wipes sweat from his neck. He nervously fiddles with a tool belt which holds futuristic tools.
As lights come up, both are busy at various computers. The tone is serious as if life depended on their actions.
GENERAL MONROE
All monitors on station-wide.
CHIEF OATES
Countdown sixty seconds to target.
Out the window an orbiting space station comes into view. The spacesuit momentarily float out of sight.
GENERAL MONROE
It's all up to you now, Chief Oates.
CHIEF OATES
Trying to make me nervous, General.
(into a computer microphone)
Ptolomy 4, this is Ptolomy 5 reporting ready.
PTOLOMY 4 VOICE
Ptolomy 4, reporting ready.
CHIEF OATES
There will be no further communications.
GENERAL MONROE
(into a different microphone)
This is General Monroe to all Ptolomy 5 departments. We are thirty seconds from showdown. Monitors will show Mir 16 coming into view. Wish us luck.
(to Oates)
Easy, Chief.
(Chief Oates concentrates on the window, one hand manipulating a lever.)
CHIEF OATES
Coming into range.
GENERAL MONROE
(crosses her fingers)
Careful. Careful. Aim at the Russian side, it'll crumble like the beach at high tide.
CHIEF OATES
Ready. Aim. Fire!
Part of the space station explodes.
PTOLOMY 4 VOICE
Shit. Missed.
OATES AND MONROE
Yes! Got it!
(They jump up and down, slapping hands, bumping butts, clearly happy.)
PTOLOMY 4 VOICE
(frustrated, sarcastic)
Congratulations Ptolomy 5. By the way, that visitor you were expecting next week. Should be there in about ten minutes.
CHIEF OATES
(bragging)
Don't feel too bad, fellas. It's only a few days before Mir 16 comes round again. Maybe you'll clean your view-finders by then.
PTOLOMY 4 VOICE
Assholes.
GENERAL MONROE
(on station microphone)
Once again Ptolomy 5 is declared the winner of the weekly space-shoot. Those of you who won bets can pick up your winnings at the canteen.
(They watch as the spacesuit floats by the window. They look at each other, then look away, put a few things in place.)
CHIEF OATES
Did you hear what they said?
GENERAL MONROE
Hmmm?
CHIEF OATES
C.I.D.'s on its way.
GENERAL MONROE
(worried)
I heard.
The spacesuit comes into view again and floats by. It drifts in and out, sometimes spinning in humorous positions.
CHIEF OATES
Doc Thomas always was a cut up.
GENERAL MONROE
Yep.
CHIEF OATES
Look at the way he twirls.
GENERAL MONROE
Yep.
CHIEF OATES
I'd never've guessed a spacesuit could jackknife.
GENERAL MONROE
Much less play chicken with a launching shuttle.
CHIEF OATES
It's a jungle out there.
(General Monroe checks her watch, then inspects the padlock.)
GENERAL MONROE
What do you think is in here?
CHIEF OATES
He was a comic book freak.
GENERAL MONROE
Paper or virtual?
CHIEF OATES
No reason to lock up virtual books. Now the paper ones, those'll buy a vacation house in the Branson.
(General Monroe checks her watch)
GENERAL MONROE
C.I.D'll be here in five minutes.
(Chief Oates stares at the mysterious message on the wall: "ONLY BARBARIANS SURVIVE".)
CHIEF OATES
What do you think he meant by this?
GENERAL MONROE
Rather obvious.
CHIEF OATES
They'll blame me.
GENERAL MONROE
Stick to our story.
CHIEF OATES
It had to be equipment failure. I'm in such deep doo-doo.
GENERAL MONROE
Stop whining.
(They nervously move around the room, checking computer equipment, noting their findings on palm recorders, both clearly distracted.)
GENERAL MONROE
(She checks a monitor)
He's on his way.
CHIEF OATES
Oh Mary, Jesus! I killed Dr. Thomas. Something I did, didn't do.
GENERAL MONROE
The equipment checked out. This wasn't your fault.
CHIEF OATES
I'm going spend the rest of my life as a maid to a convict named Tiny with biceps the size of—
GENERAL MONROE
Dr. Thomas was a depressed old man. He killed himself. Let's stick to that.
CHIEF OATES
I knew I should've gone to mortician's school.
GENERAL MONROE
Chief Oates! You are a Master Chief. Act like one.
CHIEF OATES
General, Doc is floating out there like a hooked mackerel and it's my job to make sure things like that don't happen. That's an agent from C.I.D., Criminal Investigations Division, on his way here, to see me, and Dr. Thomas... he's dead.
A door opens and SPECIAL AGENT HOOVER enters.
(He looks at the two of them, locates a trash receptacle, bends over it and throws up.)
CHIEF OATES
That is not my fault.
(Hoover rises, holding his stomach, swallowing precariously. One shoulder shrugs.)
AGENT HOOVER
Sorry.
GENERAL MONROE
I'd get the doctor but—
AGENT HOOVER
Special Agent Hoover.
(to Oates)
General Monroe?
CHIEF OATES
No, that's her.
(babbling)
I'm Maintenance Chief Oates. I got together all the weekly repair logs for you and can show you the docking bay when you're ready. Do you want to do that now? No. You probably want to see Engineering first. I knew that. I'm ready. I can take you to—
(Hoover puts a hand on his stomach as if he might vomit again.)
AGENT HOOVER
I never get used to that landing whoosh.
CHIEF OATES
You'd think they'd fix that. It's do-able, just put an extra O-ring on the—
AGENT HOOVER
General Monroe.
GENERAL MONROE
Agent.
AGENT HOOVER
Why is he still there?
(She isn't sure what he means until Agent Hoover points to the spacesuit.)
GENERAL MONROE
Earth Operations informed us you wouldn't be here until next week. I learned of your impending arrival only a few minutes ago. (Pause) Ptolomy 5 is the smallest Moon Base, minimum military presence, limited medical facilities.
AGENT HOOVER
So, you've left him hanging out there for two weeks?
GENERAL MONROE
We... I thought it best that the scene be kept intact, and to bring him inside would disturb the workers.
AGENT HOOVER
Every human being should be treated with respect, don't you agree?
GENERAL MONROE
I didn't leave him there as an affront to his human dignity, I just didn't want to...
AGENT HOOVER
Disrupt the station's routine?
GENERAL MONROE
No.
AGENT HOOVER
Didn't leave him there—
CHIEF OATES
To rot. (A beat) If we'd brought him inside, all of us on this level would smell the decay, Sir. Our facilities are meant for—
GENERAL MONROE
Dr. Thomas is Science Elite. Three decades ago he spear-headed the Genesis Project. I couldn't send him back to earth without their documentation, which is stuck in personnel or Immigration... I'm not sure which. So until that was straightened out, the best way to preserve him was leave him in space.
AGENT HOOVER
(aside)
I am in the sticks.
(Hoover makes himself at home at the doctor's desk. His shoulder twitches.)
AGENT HOOVER
I want to interview everyone with access codes to this level and any patients he saw in the last week.
GENERAL MONROE
Agent Hoover, Dr. Thomas was terminally ill.
AGENT HOOVER
Odd that an M.D. with a Ph.D. in comparative planetology should spend his later years as a Moon Base physician.
GENERAL MONROE
This job was a sort of retirement for him. He believed artificial gravity along with sterile air would help his pain. It is my opinion that he recognized the time had come, and ended his life.
CHIEF OATES
(jovial)
Everybody on this base is as healthy as Bill Gates VIII's stock portfolio.
AGENT HOOVER
I'll keep that in mind as I investigate the doctor's murder.
GENERAL MONROE
Murder?
CHIEF OATES
Murder!
(Oates sits down.)
Oh, Mary, Jesus.
GENERAL MONROE
Nothing supports that conclusion.
AGENT HOOVER
(to Oates)
Have maintenance logs sent to this console. In the meantime, I'll look over this little Frankenstein lab that appears to have been set up in the most secure area of the base.
GENERAL MONROE
This is a science oriented Moon Base. We're supposed to look technical. And be secure.
AGENT HOOVER
Are you making fun of me?
GENERAL MONROE
Anything you don't understand, just ask and I'll explain.
AGENT HOOVER
But can I believe you?
(looks at Dr. Thomas)
GENERAL MONROE
Let me save you some time. This was an accident.
AGENT HOOVER
I thought it was suicide.
GENERAL MONROE
Or it was suicide. I hand picked this crew. No one had reason to kill the doctor.
AGENT HOOVER
I'll start my interviews with his nurse.
(Looks at a palm-recorder. His shoulder shrugs.)
AGENT HOOVER
Have Jenna Baker report at 0900 hours.
GENERAL MONROE
Have you heard a word I've said?
AGENT HOOVER
Every syllable, every vowel, every consonant.
(The two stand opposite each other, like gunfighters.)
GENERAL MONROE
I will report of your unprofessional, arrogant attitude to Earth Operations.
AGENT HOOVER
Is Nurse Baker as incompetent as her evaluation from Moon Base 12 seems to indicate?
(Chief Oates nods his head and makes a curvaceous figure with his hands.)
AGENT HOOVER
Oh, then I'll do her first.
GENERAL MONROE
I'll report that too.
(General Monroe exits as...)
LIGHTS DOWN.